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Nov. 29th, 2009

I am now officially a published woman! The Encyclopedia of Herbology comes out on Tuesday to a bookstore near you! I can't believe it myself, really.

[Private to self]
Ted and I are really trying to work things out. I thought I had lost him there for awhile. It scared me, but with the way things had been going I was just about ready to cut my losses. How awful is that? I gave that man my vow to go with him to the ends of the earth, and I was ready to give up. Still, the fact of the matter was that I hadn't seen him in months so what was I supposed to do, to think? I don't know where he went, but I'm glad he's back. I missed my husband.

Sep. 24th, 2009

It's done.

It's done!

The encyclopedia is done. I finished with Z and I put it in the post for editing. I'll get it back in a couple of weeks, make some changes and then it should be released in the book stores. It's been a really long journey with this encyclopedia and I'm glad I took some time off work to get it done because I did it. And it's done. And that's fabulous.

Now if only Ted were here to

Sep. 20th, 2009

[Private to Thomas]

I talked to Narcissa. And after a grueling conv She's not wholly unreasonable, it seems. As long as we get a doctor's note for you saying you need to be seen once a week you can go to this specialist. I've already talked to the specialist and she's agreed to write a note without giving details. So, it's all arranged. You're first appointment is this weekend.

Sep. 6th, 2009

[Private to Thomas]

You have been weighing heavily on my mind as of late. I'm finding it hard to sleep at night even. You asked for help a few weeks ago and I'm still mad at your Dad for I want to help. I've looked into some wizarding therapy and some life coaches. Does something like that sound like it would be what you want?

Aug. 31st, 2009

[Private to Self]

I don't know where I went wrong in all of this. I feel as though I've failed as a Mother on all fronts for a varied number of reasons and now I feel as though I've failed as a Wife as well. I could have looked harder for Nymphadora and if I did she would be a part of the family and maybe Thomas wouldn't be so angry with me all the time. He is so miserable. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at me, though the eye contact is rare at best. It's almost as though he takes pleasure in hurting me, but I know that is not true. Deep down he still cares about his family. My only hope is that Penny doesn't grow to resent me like Thomas does. I think sending her back to school is the best thing I can do for our relationship, but for her? Narcissa promised she would keep an eye on Penny, but how good are the woman's words? We have barely spoken in the last twenty years and when we do it only ends in a yelling match. There is no telling what this year at Hogwarts will look like. I can only hope.

Ted... I still hold strongly to the belief that he loves me, but it's starting to feel as though I am losing my grasp. He wakes up to leave for work before I'm out of bed and he's home only after I'm already asleep. I am married to a ghost and my greatest fear is that he is cheating on me. Just a few months ago we were doing great. We had our anniversary.. he did sweet things for me for Mother's day.. and now? Where did this come from? He is cold and distant. We're fighting all the time. I can't stand it. Between he and Thomas.... they are ripping the family a part. The only good thing in all of this was having Draco stay with us, but now he and Penny will be gone tomorrow and I'll be left alone... because Merlin knows Ted won't be around. I'm just going to finish my encyclopedia and go back to the Green Houses. Two can play at this game.

Aug. 25th, 2009

I'm on W in my encyclopedia. Merlin knows I've had nothing but time lately especially with Ted being so it's been going faster than I originally thought. At this rate I can have the book out in stores before the end of the year.

[Private to Penny]

We should talk about the next school year. I I spoke to my sister and I believe it will be safe for you to go back.

[/private]

Jul. 27th, 2009

Private to Draco )

Jul. 26th, 2009

[Private to Ted Tonks]
Ted... we need to have a talk. Now.

[Private to Lily]

I need some advice. I feel like I'm usually the one giving it out, but this time I really think I need some help with Thomas.

And what's going on with Hermione Granger? I read about her in the Prophet and then James said the Order was responsible for her now, but I don't understand why. Do we have her somewhere? I think he closed his journal because he didn't answer my question.

Jul. 25th, 2009

[Private to Thomas, Penny, Nymphadora and Draco]

It's been a couple of days now and I wanted to check in with each of you to make sure you're all doing alright? He was your cousin, after all.

Jul. 24th, 2009

[Private to Ted]

She actually responded! I can hardly believe it. Bellatrix was civil. She said thank you even. She must be doing really awful. I feel like I should be there for her.

Jul. 21st, 2009

[Private to Self, Ted may read]

I would send condolences if I thought my Sister might actually take the time to read it before burning the letter. It's really just wasted ink and parchment at this point. Is it awful that it's been so long since I've seen any of them that it's hard for me to remember that we're even family? I never met Constatine personally, but from everything that I heard about him.. well, he seemed absolutely foul. I didn't know Hermione either, but I know she's been through a lot, she's a friend of Lily's, Molly's second-daughter and Draco's best mate so she couldn't really be as bad as they're making her out to be, could she?

But still... even the thought of a 15 year old girl using an unforgivable like that is enough to make my skin crawl. My kids would never, would they? Surely not Thomas...

Jul. 8th, 2009

Thank Merlin. They're letting the kids out today.

[Private to Thomas]
I'm going to come and pick you up. Will you stay with us for a few days before you run off?

Jul. 2nd, 2009

I've been getting loads done on my encyclopedia. The publishers are giving me until the end of the year to submit it and then another three months for edits. I've made it to the F's. Fanged Geraniums, Fire Seeds, Fire Seed Bushes, Flitterblooms, Flutterby bushes, Fluxweeds...I could go on, but I won't bore you. I suppose that's the only real news at the moment, and I rather like it that way. Means nothing bad is happening. That I know of.

[Private to Ted]
What do you say we get a babysitter for Penny tonight and have the house to ourselves? It feels like it's been forever since I've really seen you. I hate it when you work late.

[Private to Nymphadora]
How's my granddaughter? And my daughter? I'd love for the both of you to come by sometime. I know Penny would enjoy it as well.

[Private to Lily]
I saw your note to the Order. I wasn't exactly sure how to respond. I know you and Severus were close in school. I remember that, but I've never explicitly trusted him myself...but I do trust you. I was hanging back to see what everyone else had to say, but it didn't seem they had much to say on the subject either.

Jun. 17th, 2009

[Private to Draco]
It was really lovely having you here for a few weeks. Thank you for spending time with us. What are you planning on doing now that school is getting out?

[Private to Penny, Thomas, Ted]
What would you like to do over the summer break? I was thinking about taking an educational trip somewhere. Visit the Pyramids?

Jun. 4th, 2009

[Private to self, flashing red for Lily Potter to review]

List of people to send invites:
Tonks family
Potter family
Weasley family
Sirius Black
Remus Lupin
Regulus Black
Pansy Parkinson (Regulus may be able to excuse her from school)
Nymphadora Carrow
Malfoy family
Penelope Clearwater
Severus Snape

It would either have to be the Malfoy family or Severus, but I do believe Severus won't be able to attend? How do you suppose Draco would feel if his parents were there? Perhaps best not to invite either, or just Severus.

Anyone else?

May. 27th, 2009

I have decided to quit working at the Green Houses for a while. The staff is all hired and up to date and I'm confident that they will do well without me hovering around them. With everything that has been going on in the world and with my family specifically it's just time for me to stay home. I'm going to be home-schooling Penny and working on my Herbology Encyclopedia. I've found a publisher that has paid me a lot of money after sending them just a few pages. They seemed to think it is a good idea as well. I think this will be a good thing for all of us.

[Private to Penny]
I'm so glad to have you home. We'll go visit your Dad every day, okay?

[Private to Nymphadora]
You're the only person who I know that actually works inside the Ministry. Do we know anything yet? Has there been a new Minister of Magic established? How is the baby? If you need help with her I have a lot of free time now and since I'll be home all day I can do all the babysitting you could ever need. I know the father is in her life, but if you need me, I'm here too.

[Private to Thomas]
When do you want to head back to Hogwarts? There's no rush, I just need to send an owl to that Umbridge woman. You are certainly welcome to stay in your old room now that Penny is home. Thought you might like to spend some time with her.

[Private to Ted]
Ted, I know you can't read this, but I need you to know how much I love you. All I can think about is the amazing Mother's day you made for me and how loved I felt by you. I know we have our fights and we don't always agree on everything, but you mean so much to me. I don't regret a thing, and I hope you don't either. Come back to me. I can't won't do this alone.

May. 18th, 2009

Backdated to night of the incident

[Private to Tonks family]

I was at Diagon when it happened and they kept me for questioning. I'm so sorry, but they wouldn't let me get out of there until now. I'm on my way to the hospital. Thomas, are you already there? Do I need to get you from Hogwarts? I can't believe this. I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry.

May. 4th, 2009

[Private to Thomas]

I can't believe I'm

Thomas..you're the only one who is on my side with this whole issue, so I need to talk to you. Penny is driving us nuts at home. All she ever talks about is going back to school and about how miserable she is. She doesn't want to go to muggle school temporarily until we figure something out, and I don't know where else to send her. The Order is talking about a make shift school and the Potters offered her a place to stay with them so she would be with Harry and Lily and James are home schooling him. Ted and I don't have the time to home school her and I can't send her to Durmstrang or Beauxbatons. What about the school in America?

I'm just thinking out loud to you. I don't want this all on your shoulders, but I would appreciate your opinion on the matter. She's your little sister.

Apr. 22nd, 2009

[Private to Thomas]
She hasn't even been headmistress a day and already you have detention. You should know that talking to someone like her won't get you anywhere. If I had any sense at all I would pull you out just like Penny.

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